Understanding conversational styles to connect

There was a time when i used to come home and complain constantly about my coworkers or boss to my wife and she would listen patiently and offer her suggestions.However after that i would feel much more angrier and stressed and she would also walk away frustrated.Why was this happening?Because both of us were having different types of conversation.You need not be a trained genius to be a great conversationalist Its just you need to understand the type of conversation one is having. There are basically 3 types of conversations. The first type of conversation is Practical Conversation where we discuss what this about and the goal is to discover what each participant wants from this discussion.The second type of conversation is Emotional Conversation where we discuss how we feel where the aim is to recognise and reciprocate vulnerability and then there is a social conversation where we discuss who we are ,where we are from,our friends,schools etc. If we do not understand what kind of conversation is occurring we will never be able to connect.We need to have the same type of conversation to be able to connect.That was what was happening during the conversation with my wife.I was having an emotional conversation whereas she was having a practical conversation.Recognising each conversation and matching that conversation is easier than sounds. Look for clues when you talk to people.If they start a conversation with "ok ,here is what i want to talk about" means that the conversation is a practical conversation.if the conversation is something like "I just attended my sons graduation ceremony"it means he having an emotional conversation .So your response should be like "Great ,how was it".As you can see from above,its not hard being a natural conversationalist.Once we learn what kind of conversation is happening,and we strive to match them,this will become a habit.

PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT